It's almost AUGUST, you guys

In an interesting turn of events, I have decided to accept a tiny bit of a job covering new episodes of the Duggars for iVillage. HOW HILARIOUS IS THIS, YOU GUYS? I mean, let's be honest, I DO love the Duggars. But I am going to get PAID to watch the Duggars and then write a blog post about what they do. Is America great or WHAT? I've written a post or two before about the Duggars when they needed me to in a pinch, but now I am the official Duggar Correspondent. I kid you not, that is my title. What REALLY made me laugh about the whole thing is that I got an email from one of the iVillage editors asking me if I wanted to do this, and telling me she'd heard I was a bit of a Duggar expert.

Did you catch that? I HAVE A DUGGAR-RELATED REPUTATION, you guys. I am getting that engraved on my tombstone. Anyway, my posts will be up on Wednesdays, and if you're interested in the Duggars (don't act like you don't care, because I know you do) you should check it out and get involved in the comment discussion. Apparently people are VERY PASSIONATE about the Duggars. I do have to say, if there's one thing you can say about them, it's that they have kids who love each other and take care of each other, and for as much criticism as they receive about overpopulating the world and breathing too much of other people's air (I swear I have heard that) they are nice people. I'm all for the world having too many people who breathe too much air if they're going to be nice people. This is a family who has been on television for YEARS now and no one is going to be breaking any scandals about them – and even if they're making BUCKETS of money off of these TV deals, they're not acting shady with the cash, you know? I approve.

We've been busy around here just doing Summer. It's hard to believe it's the end of July already, but it most obviously is, and all you have to do is walk around Target and you'll see that every summer item they've been carrying is marked down to something like ninety cents. I spent seven dollars last week buying four huge shovels and rakes for our beach trip, plus a kite, two water guns, and a lizard. As exciting as landing those deals was, I am generally TOTALLY BUMMED that summer is going to be over soon. Summer is going to be over and I am still going to have zero idea how to dress for cold weather. I posted about that a few months ago, didn't I? I love summer clothes and I like the stuff I already have to wear in the summer and I have such an easy time finding things I want to buy for summer but FALL? I made some sort of promise to myself that I would invest in an actual wardrobe for fall and winter this year that doesn't make me look frumpy or like I'm still in college and I'm about to throw a tantrum because I DON'T WANNA START DOING IT. I want to look nice, I do; I just don't want to do the work and I don't want to spend the money. Summer tank top: $8 at Target or $6 at Old Navy. Winter sweater: $60 and up, NO MATTER WHERE YOU SHOP. The thought of it makes me feel ill.

Also I am already totally dreading winter – I have a family beach trip coming up and then the Blathering in Austin and then we head to Disney World and then Christmas and then... nothing. Nothing fun to look forward to on the calendar for months and months and months and I am like one of those brides who gets depressed after the wedding because there's nothing to plan or obsess over. Wasn't it awful when you got married and had no reason to contemplate cake flavors all day? And that scares me because those boring periods of time is when I come up with really innovative plans like LET'S HAVE ANOTHER BABY OR SOMETHING. At least then we won't be bored and we'll have stuff to DO. Also look at this long stretch of TIME just SITTING BEFORE US.

(Dave's head just exploded reading this post.)

At the risk of this post being all over the place (HA HA HA IT ALREADY IS) I just want to say thanks to those of you who commented on our swim lesson situation with Asher via Twitter the other day. I know it isn't the end of the world if my kid doesn't LOVE water at four years of age; I know that a lot of what looks like fear in him is often just extreme caution, and he is extremely cautious about a LOT of stuff. He is willing to swim by himself in any amount of water as long as he has a swim ring on and that makes me feel great. It seems like a lot of you have kids who went through similar things and then one day they were just all, Hey! Water! It's not acid burning my eyes out and it's FUN to swim in! And I am hoping we get to that point soon, but I also have to be patient and realize (for the millionth time) that my children are not little pieces of me walking around, enjoying all the same things I've learned to enjoy and facing new things with the same amount of experience I already have. I forget that sometimes. I also have to remember that my kids aren't other people's kids either, and that even though OTHER kids enjoy swimming, mine might not be there quite yet and it's FINE. I'll bet there are other kids in the world who don't want to do subtraction problems for hours on end, but since you can't necessarily SEE other kids subtracting like you can swimming, I'LL NEVER KNOW.

Comments

[Jessica]

I took my almost 3 year old to lessons today and he did horribly! He loves water and is great with the rings on, but he's not great with "structure" and would rather spend class time in the baby pool, alone. And I know he's three and a boy, but he needs to learn to have a little patience and learn to follow instructions and share!

[HereWeGoAJen]

I am so excited that you are the new Duggar correspondent. I realized recently that there have been FOUR new Duggars since Elizabeth was born. I mean, I realize there are two of them reproducing to only one of me, but yikes. I bet they manage another two or so more before I have another kid too.

I was not a fan of swimming lessons when I was little. Now I am able to swim and I no longer throw tantrums at the pool.

[Mama Bub]

To me, that sounds like a dream job. Watching TLC and writing about it? Yes, please?

Also, Target? Please put away the Halloween decorations. I can't handle that in July.

[Simply Complex]

That last bit about kids not being the same...isn't that a pisser? I have to remind myself about this ALL of the time and I still don't think that I have come to terms with it. I want them to WANT to do what I want to do, and what I enjoy!

[Arlen]

Congrats about your job but my opinion is that the Duggars are just too obnoxious of a topic. In fact, we've blocked that channel just so we don't accidentally give them any ratings. LOL They're not actually raising their kids, their kids are raising their kids through the "buddy" system. Why did you have the kids then? It's just like people who have kids for the welfare benefit - the longer they tote the XX amount of kids, the longer they turn into the commercialization of the family.

[Emily]

Arlen, I totally disagree. If you're going to use that argument against the Duggars, then you have to say that (totally untrue) thing about why have kids if you're going to work and put them in daycare? I 100 percent believe the Duggars are raising their own kids. Yes, they get a lot of help from their other kids. But I do it too - I am always so happy that I have Lucy to entertain Asher!

[Swistle]

Yesterday on Twitter I saw your first tweet about swimming lessons, and I was composing a tweet saying what drove me crazy was that NO ONE HERE IS GOING TO LET YOU DROWN---and AS I was writing it, there was another tweet from you saying the exact same thing. SWIMMING LESSON BONDING.

[Lisa]

I've been watching the Duggars for years, and I'm kind of appalled at the kind of negative response people have toward them. They pay their own way, moreso than most Americans, with no debt. Their kids are all well behaved, polite, and seem (most importantly) happy. It's kind of disturbing to me that people are so vehemently opposed to the simple fact that they don't use birth control and have a large family.

And I say this from the perspective of the raging left wing liberal that I am; their politics are clearly different from mine, but they're not preachy and seem respectful of others' choices. So I don't get why people dislike them.

The thing I found the most shocking was that when Michelle Duggar's last baby was born devastatingly premature, I commented my well wishes on her TLC blog, and there were thousands of negative comments posted there. Who could leave a negative comment when a woman has just given birth to a baby three months early? People are weird.

[Superfantastic]

I could tell that summer is almost over when I walked into Target and saw school supplies. NO, TARGET, IT IS NOT TIME YET.

My nephew (almost four) who has always loved the pool and motored all over the place in his swim ring spent his entire first swim lesson this year clinging to my brother's neck and shouting NO NO NO NO NO!!! And this is a kid who is entirely unfamiliar with the concept of caution.

[Anna]

Re: Swimming. My son is 5. Last year I signed him up for swim lessons at the local Y, the class where the parent participates, too. He clung to me like a little wet koala, not *hating* the water, but not wanting to let go, either. I almost didn't sign him up for lessons this year because of that. However, he expressed more interest, and wound up moving him up to the next class level right away the one where the parent doesn't have to get wet). So, now he's like a little fish and loves the water, swimming every day in summer camp. Although he still thinks I rinse his hair with hydrochloric acid judging by his reaction ;)

[Kristin Hardwick]

This made me laugh. Like all your posts. I do not have kids yet, but have read your blog for quite a long time purely bc I think we could be friends :) gotta love the internet haha!

[Shayla]

Re: clothing
I am on the opposite end. I love fall clothes but have nothing for summer. Every year I wonder what I wore the previous year! I recommend the book 'Good Girls Don't Have to Dress Bad.' Get it cheap off Amazon. Although it is only a year old, some pics seem decades old however, the info is great! I hope it comes in handy and makes shopping easier for you. I have no connection to it other than I have given away about 10 copies as gifts. It was a life changer for my non fashionable friend. I think it will simply be a good resource for you as you seem to already have a great fashion sense.

[Jen]

I am struggling with that whole last paragraph right now with Maggie. I just... don't want her to miss out on Fun Things, you know? (riding bikes, swimming, rides at the amusement park, foods that don't contain the word 'macaroni' in the title) But I guess if she doesn't like doing them then... they're not REALLY Fun Things? For her, at least. Right? SIGH.

[Melani]

I love the Duggars--we only live about 20 miles away from them so my kids love seeing them go to places that we go to as well. They are so kind to each other--it makes realize that if a family of 20+ can do that surely my family of 4 can figure out how to be kind to each other.

I don't understand the criticism--they are very open of their beliefs and life choices but don't expect others to live exactly as they do.

[Bethany]

I may have posted before about swimming but anyways, my son (turned 5 in May) was wearing a swim vest until a month ago. He wanted to, we have a pool, swim lessons were hard to make time for (he has three older, busy siblings) so we just let him wear it. Then one day about a month ago I thought I would try giving him a little swim lesson myself, and had him get in the pool without his vest on. I did a little preliminary stuff, and then gave him a little push toward the steps and lo, he swimmeth! Let Asher wear his floatie as long as he wants, he is learning to swim while he's wearing it. I bet he'll be a dolphin next summer.

[Frema]

Hey, speaking of babies, weren't you going to tell us about a pregnancy scare you had a while back? Not that I'm obsessed with other people's family planning or anything.

[Molly]

Um...I am jealous. What if you get to MEET the Duggars??? Can you even imagine? Take me with you.

[Jenna]

Duggars? I love your life.

Jenna
momofmanyhats.blogspot.com

[Janet]

Wow you have had a busy summer! I don't comment here often, but I do have a question/request. Not only are you hilarious and I sincerely enjoy reading your blog, but you always recommend the BEST books. Have you had any time to read this summer? I am going on a trip in a couple weeks and I want to know what you think is good. (And whether blatant flattery works.)

[Linnea]

Oh, on clothes, I'm the total opposite. I love fall/winter clothes. Could be because I spent the 10 years in Chicago/Nebraska so I amassed quite a collection of sweaters & turtlenecks, which I adore. Summer clothes make me feel flobbley and it's so cold inside any building I wind up in a cardigan anyway, so the layers thing has always sort of been essential. We should make a plan to take the other shopping during their season of discontent to share our own seasonal shopping joy. That might help...

[Tracey]

Yeah! Does this mean we get to go on a field trip to Arkansas?